Short Answer: Girls love a CHALLENGE. Never SEEK to please.
What attracts a woman to a man is strength. Not simply physical, but the mental and emotional bandwidth to remain centered and true to himself. This is the essence of CONFIDENCE, which is enforced by:
-Having his purpose in life independently of her.
-Does NOT smother her with texts and calls, has complete certainty.
-Gives space for HER to pursue (especially between dates.)
-Is CONTENT…fulfilled and ambitious for more.
-Indifferent to her presence…great if she is there, but he’s just fine if she’s not.
Banter is one of the most important behaviors to have when it comes to attraction. It can be the purest form of self-expression. The more CONFIDENCE you have, the more you want to EXPRESS yourself. It exemplifies your humor, wit, intelligence, relatability, and thus charm. It is the SEPARATOR. Most guys won’t even make an attempt at teasing a hot girl from fear of her response. Girls connect to sex through their emotions. If you can make them laugh, they will associate that feeling with you intrinsically, therefore want to be closer to you. This is why bantering is the best avenue for this connection. It is the ART of flirtation. This does NOT mean you ACT stupidly by making ill remarks about her appearance, poor sexual innuendo jokes, and bounce around like a jack-in-the-box. Masculine humor comes from charm. Charm is wit. Wit is expressing the truth playfully. You’re comfortable being yourself wherever you are, assured, and NEVER questioning it. This is why a lot of great stand-up comedians always attract women. I mention Matt Rife, especially in my book, because he is the perfect example of this. Look at his audience, it’s ALL chicks, young to old.
Here’s the secret to bantering: GIRLS LOVE CHALLENGE. They don’t want some spineless DO-BOY simp who SEEKS to PLEASE her. They want a guy who will demonstrate his inner fortitude towards her. For example, NOT changing your opinion to match hers or apologizing when you say something she doesn't agree with. THIS proves that YOU can keep her safe. You must stand up to her and not bend to her tests. This is what shit tests are, attempting to get YOU to do what SHE wants.
You’re just there on the date to make her smile and laugh. Have a good time like anywhere else. The critical component to understand about female attraction is regardless of the outcome or how she responds to you, she CANNOT sway YOU from CHANGING your opinions or humor to please her. This is often misconstrued as being a ‘jerk’ to her, but THIS is what all CHADS do. It makes you dangerous and exciting. Emotions, remember?
The truth is girls just want to have FUN. That Cyndi Lauper song from the 1980’s said it best. You can only get them to this point of femininity if you can demonstrate yourself in a dominant way…pursuing your purpose (NOT HER) being UNAFRAID of playful humor, and not taking yourself too seriously is how this is achieved. Think of it as teasing a good friend or a younger cousin...poking fun at each other in a loving way. What I found to CONSISTENTLY work at raising a girl’s attraction is saying ridiculous things with a straight face. This immediately grabs her attention. REMEMBER it’s a show of strength and social proof. This will PEAK her interest immediately. If she isn’t amused or want to throw a quip back at you, you’re simply not appealing enough. THAT IS THE POINT. You’re testing for compatibility, ALWAYS. If you can PLAY with her, you can STAY with her.
In short: When you LOVE yourself first, you're certain, and she’ll want to be apart of it.